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                                    Cows
     
   
                  ...:::///  CLASSIC COWS  \\\:::...

             Part 1 of the 5-part COMPLETE GUIDE TO COWS!
                  ________________________
         (__)    /                        \         * OFFICIAL EDITION *
         (oo)   ( A real COWlector's Item! )
  /-------\/  --'\________________________/        * SUMMER 1991 ISSUE! *
 / |     ||
*  ||----||             Edited by David A. Bader
   ^^    ^^             Please send your submissions to:
     Cow                dbader@scarecrow.csee.lehigh.edu

-  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -
--------------------
TABLE OF COW-NTENTS:
--------------------

 Part 1 ................................... The Classic Cows
 Part 2 ................................... The Sequel of the Cows
 Part 3 ................................... The Return of the Cows
 Part 4 ................................... The Barnyard Gallery
 Part 5 ................................... The Ancient History of the Cows

-  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -

  ______________
  |  D.A.B.'S  |            (__)          (__)          (__)          (__)
  |    USED    |            (uu)          (uu)          (uu)          (uu)
  |    COWS    |     /-------\/    /-------\/    /-------\/    /-------\/
  |____________|   / |     ||    / |     ||    / |     ||    / |     ||
        ||        *  ||----||   *  ||----||   *  ||----||   *  ||----||
        ||           ~~    ~~      ~~    ~~      ~~    ~~      ~~    ~~
  ______||_______
  | EASY CREDIT |           (__)          (__)          (__)          (__)
  |_____________|           (uu)          (uu)          (uu)          (uu)
        ||           /-------\/    /-------\/    /-------\/    /-------\/
        ||          / |     ||    / |     ||    / |     ||    / |     ||
        ||         *  ||----||   *  ||----||   *  ||----||   *  ||----||
        ||            ~~    ~~      ~~    ~~      ~~    ~~      ~~    ~~

-  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -

         (__)             (__)             (__)             (__)
         (oo)             (oo)             (oo)             (oo)
  /-------\/       /-------\/       /-------\/       /-------\/
 / |     ||       / |     ||       / |     ||       / |     ||
*  ||----||      *  ||W---||      *  ||w---||      *  ||V---||
   ^^    ^^         ^^    ^^         ^^    ^^         ^^    ^^
     Cow           Cow laden        Same cow      Nancy Reagan-type
                   with milk     after milking      cow with milk

         (___)             (___)    *        (___)             (___)
         (o o)             (o o)     \       (o o)             (o o)
  /-------\ /       /-------\ /       \-------\ /       /-------\ /
 / |     ||O       / |     ||O         |     ||O       / | ~#>-+|O
*  ||,---||       *  ||@\--||          ||,---||       *  ||,----|
   ^^    ^^          ^^    ^^          ^^    ^^          ^^     ^
     Bull       Same bull after    Rotc bull after    Red-blooded American
Bull
                seeing above cow   seeing other bull   shooting the Rotc
bull


         (__)             (__)             (__)             (__)
         (oo)             (oo)             (oo)             (oo)
  /-------\/-*     /-------\/       /-------\/   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 / |     || \     )*)(\/* /  *     / |     ||
*  ||----||  *   \ |||/)|/()(    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
\/|(/)(/\/(,,/   \)|(/\/|)(/\
  Cow munching   Grass munching   Cow in water       Cow in trouble
    on grass         on cow

          (__)             (__)    *        (__) *      (__)
          (oo)             (oo)     \       (oo) |      (oo)
  /--------\/      /-oooooo-\/       \-------\/  \-------\/
 * o|     ||      * ooooooooo     o  o|     ||   /     ||
    ||----||     ooooooooooooo        ||----||>==/-----||
 ooo^^    ^^    ooooooooooooooooo     ^^    ^^         ^^
  Cow taking      Cow in deep         Cow getting the shit
    a shit            shit             kicked out of her


         (__)
         (oo)                       U
  /-------\/                    /---V
 / |     ||                    * |--|                       .
*  ||----||
   ^^    ^^

Cow at 1 meter.         Cow at 100 meters.        Cow at 10,000 meters.



         (__)                     )__(                vv    vv
         (oo)                     (oo)                ||----||  *
  /-------\/               *-------\/                 ||     | /
 / |     ||               / |     ||                 /\-------/
*  ||----||              /  ||----||                (oo)
   ^^    ^^                 vv    vv                (~~)

American Cow              Polish Cow            Australian Cow



         (__)                     (__)                     (__)
         (oo)                ____ (oo)                _---_(oo)
  /-------\/               /-    --\/               /-     -\/
 / |     ||               / |     ||               /|      ||
*  ||----||              *  ||___-||              *  ||___-||
   ^^    ^^                 ^^    ^^                 ^^    ^^

Freshman Cow at          Freshman Cow             Freshman Cow
start of school     After the "Freshman 15"    After the "Freshman 20"


         (__)                     (__)                     (__)
         (OO)                     (@@)                     (xx)
  /-------\/               /-------\/               /-------\/
 / |     ||               / |     ||               / |     ||
*  ||----||              *  ||----||              *  ||----||
   ^^    ^^                 ^^    ^^                 ^^    ^^

Cow who drank Jolt       Cow who ate              Cow who used Jolt to wash
                      psychadelic mushrooms      down psychadelic mushrooms


                                         /\                  __
                                        /  \                 ||
             (__)                 (__)  \  /               (_||_)
             SooS                 (oo)   \/                 (oo)
      /------S\/S          /-------\/    /S          /-------\/
     / |     ||           / |     ||    /  S        / |     ||
    *  ||----||          *  ||----||___/    S      *  ||----||
       ^^    ^^             ^^    ^^                  ^^    ^^
    This cow belonged     Ben Franklin owned       Abe Lincoln's
  to George Washington       this cow                   cow


                                                 (__)
         *        (__)                           (oo)
          \       (oo)                     /------\/
           \-------\/                     /|  |/  |
            | ==$ ||                     / |  [) ||
            ||----||                    *  ||----||
            ^^    ^^                       ^^    ^^
     Old "One Arm" belonged           This cow is obviously
       to Ceasar's Palace             Hugh Hefner's Heifer


                  (___)               (__)      (__)
                  ( O )               (oo)      (oo)
           /-------\ /                 \/--------\/
          / |     ||V                   |        |
         *  ||----||                    ||------||
            ^^    ^^                    ^^      ^^
  The cyclops that Jason and         This cow lived with
the Argonauts met had this cow          Dr. Doolittle


             (__)                   (__)
             [##]                   (@o)
      /-------\/             /-------\/              /-------  (__)
     / |     ||             / |     ||              / |     || (oo)
    *  ||----||            *  ||----||             *  ||----|---\/
       ^^    ^^               ^^    ^^                ^^    ^
 This cow belonged      This cow lived with      This cow belonged to
  to Flash Gordon       the Little Rascals       the Headless Horseman


                    (____)             (____)                           (__
)
                    (oo  )                (o  o)                        ( O
O)
         /-----------\  /          /-----\    /----          /-----------\
        / ||       |  \/          / |   |  \/   |           / ||       |  \
       /  ||       ||||           \ |  |      | | |        /  ||       ||||
      *   ||||-----||||            *| | |-----| | |       *   ||||-----||||
          /\/\     /\/\             /\ /\     /\ /\           ^^^^     ^^^^
     This cow belonged         This was Salvatore      No one was sure
whether
      to Pablo Picasso        Dali's favorite cow    M.C. Escher's cow had
four
                                                           legs or eight

                         (__)
         (__)            (oo)         (__)
         (oo)            /\/          (oo)
  /-------\/         /--/--            \/-----
 / |     ||         / |    `-.         / |    `-.
*  ||----||        *  ||----||        *  ||----||
   OO    OO           OO    OO           OO    OO

 Cow-vertible      .     .     .


                              (__)
*_                     *_     ( oo             *_
  \      (__)            \    /\/                \  (__)
   \.----( oo____         \.-/----._____          \.( oo___\____
    ||____\/____ \         ||__________ \          |_\/________ \
    OO          `OO        OO          `OO         OO          `OO

                    Cow-vette Cow-vertible  (of cowrse)


  *        (___)    *        (___)                (__)
   \       (o o)     \       (o o)                (oo)
    \-------\ /       \-------\ /          /-------\/        ________
     |     ||O         |     ||O          / |     ||_|/    O _______
     ||,---||          ||,---||          *  ||----|  --
     ^^    ^^          ^^    ^^             ^^    ^
               Twins                         Cow Catcher
  




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