Today's Jokes  |  Archives  |  Lists  |  Random  |  Register  |  RandJoke on Your Page  
 



Jokes2Go.com > Humor Lists >
Types of Boyfriends and Girlfriends



1. Joe Sensitive - "After I wash the dishes, let's cuddle, OK?"
Also known as: Mr. Nice Guy, Family man, Honey, Darling, Soft-boiled Egg,
    Snugglepup
Advantages: Well-behaved; irons own shirts
Disadvantages:  Irritatingly compassionate, wimpy


2. Old Man Grumpus - "People are stupid. The world can go to hell.
    Let's stay home and watch TV."
Also known as: Grumbles, Sour puss, Stick-in-the-mud, Old Fogey,
    Slow Mover, Jerk
Advantages:  Stays put; predictable
Disadvantages:  Royal pain in the ass


3. Flinchy - "I--I'm sorry for whatever it was I did."
Also known as:  Trembly, Creampuff, Hey you
Advantages: Jumps entertainingly when startled
Disadvantages: Easily spooked; surrenders without a struggle


4. Bigfoot - "Shut yer trap, I'm thinkin'."
Also known as: Chunk-style, Lummox, Ignoramus, Galoot, the Hulk,
    Big 'n' Dumb
Advantages: Can tote bales; is easily fooled
Disadvantages: Can break you in half, sweats like a pig


5. Lazybones - "Zzzzzz"
Also known as: Lucky Dog, Parasite, Bum, Sponge, Snoozebucket, Drug Addict
Advantages: Well rested; easy target
Disadvantages: Unlikely to fulfull your dreams


6. The Sneak - "Who, me?"
Also known as: Love Pirate, Snake, Rat, Slime, G-D Son of a Bitch
Advantages: May feel pangs of guilt
Disadvantages: May be having time of his life


7. Ace of Hearts - "After I wash the dishes let's make love like
    crazed weasels, OK?"
Also known as: The Sizzler, Handyman, Dreamboat, Casanova, Monster
Advantages: Perpetually aroused
Disadvantages: Perpetually aroused


8. The Dreamer - "Someday I'm going to be rich and famous.  I don't
    know how, but--"
Also known as: Struggling Artist, Philosopher, Buffoon, Bag of Wind
Advantages: Tells good stories
Disadvantages: Will turn into "Old Man Grumpus"


9. Mr. Right - "While the servants wash the dishes, let's make love
    like crazed weasels in my new yacht, ok?"
Also known as: Mr. Perfect, Jim Dandy
Advantages: Answer to a woman's prayer
Disadvantages: Hunted to extinction


10. Ms. Nice Guy - "Tickets to the boxing match? Oh, darling, you
    shouldn't have!"
Also known as: Whattagal, Precious, one of the boys, My Main
    Squeeze, Doormat
Advantages: Cheerful, agreeable, kindly
Disadvantages: May wise up someday


11. Old Yeller - "You G-D spineless good-for-nothing drag-ass no-talent
    son of a bitch! Can't you see you're making me miserable??"
Also known as: She-Devil, Sourpuss, the Nag, My Old Lady, Warthog from Hell
Advantages: Pays attention to you
Disadvantages: Screeches, throws frying pans


12. Sickly - "Oh, my head. My head. My feet. My cramps. My cellulite."
Also known as: Whiner, Mewler, Grumpy
Advantages: Predictable
Disadvantages: Contagious


13. The Bosser - "Stand up straight.  Put on a different tie.  Get a
    haircut. Change your job.  Make some money. Don't give me that look."
Also known as: Whipcracker, The Sarge, Ms. Know-it-all, Ball and Chain,
    Yes Mom
Advantages: Often right
Disadvantages: Often right, but so what?


14. Ms. Vaguely Dissatisfied - "I just can't decide.  Should I switch my
    career, goals, home, and hair color?"
Also known as: The Fretter, Worrywart, Typical, Aw C'mon Honey
Advantages: Easily soothed
Disadvantages: Even more easily perturbed


15. Wild Woman out of Control - "I've got an idea. Lez get drunk an'
    make love onna front lawn. I done it before. S'fun."
Also known as: Fast Girl, Freewheeler, Goodtime Charleena, Passed Out
Advantages: More fun than a barrel of monkeys
Disadvantages: Unreliable; drives off cliffs


16. Huffy - "I see nothing humorous in those silly cartoons you keep
    snickering at."
Also known as: No Fun, Humorless Prig, Cold fish, Chilly
    Proposition, Iceberg, Snarly
Advantages: Your friends will feel sorry for you
Disadvantages: You will have no friends


17. Woman from Mars - "I believe this interpretive dance will explain
    how I feel about our relationship."
Also known as: The Babbler, Spooky Girl, Screwball, Loony, Bad News, Artistic  
Advantages: Entertaining, unfathomable
Disadvantages: Will read her poetry aloud


18. Ms. Dreamgirl - "I am utterly content with you just the way you are,
    my handsome genius of a boyfriend. I think we must make love like
    crazed weasels now!"
Also known as: Ms. Right, Goddess, Knockout, Perfection, Gorgeous
Advantages: Funny, intelligent, uninhibited
Disadvantages: Will have nothing to do with you


  
‹‹ Back to Alphabetical List Menu ‹‹ Back to Categorized List Menu


Put Random List on Your Page!

To have the Random List Include displayed on your page, just copy the code below and paste it into your webpage's HTML. The random list excerpt will appear automatically, different everytime your page is viewed:

  And this is how this is how the result will look like - box not included :-) (register to be able to add border, change text color and background color of your RandList)


Jump to  




For any questions or comments email us at info@jokes2go.com
Copyright© SpekGY, Inc, 1998-2016. All rights reserved.