Today's Jokes  |  Archives  |  Lists  |  Random  |  Register  |  RandJoke on Your Page > Humor Lists >
Things NOT to Say on Dates for Guys
© Greg Bulmash. Greg Bulmash is a great humor columnist whose columns can be found at You can also read his blog at

1. "Nice outfit. Is that a wonder-bra?"

2. "I really don't like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use
this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired."

3. "No wine for me tonight.  My urologist says it's not good to mix
alcohol and penicillin."

4. "I refuse to get cable.  That's how they keep tabs on you."

5. "People say I remind them of Eddie Haskell."

6. "I used to come here all the time with my ex."

7. "I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn't hurt to consider it."

8. "Could you excuse me?  My cat gets lonely if he doesn't hear my voice
on the answering machine every hour."

9. "I like clay.  It's mushy."

10. "I really feel that I've grown in the past few years.  Used to be I wouldn't
have given someone like you a second look."

11. "And I won that trophy in the inter-fraternity belching contest."

12. "I know you said you don't eat anything with a face.  But a good
butcher will cut that part off for you if you ask."

13. "It's been tough, but I've come to accept that most people I date just
won't be as smart as I am."

14. "Dropping my pants just scared them.  But when my underwear hit the
ground... Man!  I never knew Jehovah's Witnesses could run that fast."

‹‹ Back to Alphabetical List Menu ‹‹ Back to Categorized List Menu

Put Random List on Your Page!

To have the Random List Include displayed on your page, just copy the code below and paste it into your webpage's HTML. The random list excerpt will appear automatically, different everytime your page is viewed:

  And this is how this is how the result will look like - box not included :-) (register to be able to add border, change text color and background color of your RandList)

Jump to  

For any questions or comments email us at
Copyright© SpekGY, Inc, 1998-2016. All rights reserved.