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Exercise Or Not To Exercise



1. It is well documented that for every mile that you jog, you add one minute to your 
life. This enables you, at age 85, to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home 
at $5,000 per month.


2. My grandmother started walking 5 miles a day when she was 60. She is now 97 and we 
don't know where the hell she is.


3. The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing 
again.


4. I joined a health club last year, spent about $400. Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to show up.


5. I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I am doing.


6. I don't exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our toes, he would have put them 
further up our body.


7. I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.


8. I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.


9. The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.


10. If you are going to try cross country skiing, start with a small country.


11. I don't jog - it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.


  
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