Today's jokes [2.24.18]
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A little town had a high birth rate that had attracted the attention of
the sociologists at the state university. They wrote a grant proposal; got
a huge chunk of money; hired a few additional sociologists, anthropologist
and a family planning and birth control specialist; moved to town; rented
offices; set up their computers; got squared away; and began designing
their questionnaires and such. While the staff was busy getting ready for
their big research effort, the project director decided to go to the local
drugstore for a cup of coffee. He sat down at the counter, ordered his
coffee, and while he was drinking it, he told the druggist what his
purpose was in town, then asked him if he had any idea why the birth rate
was so high. "Sure," said the druggist. "Every morning the six o'clock
train comes through here and blows for the crossing. It wakes everybody
up, and, well, it's too late to go back to sleep, and it's too early to
Q: What did Jesus do when he got to the Holiday Inn?
A: He threw some nails down on the counter and asked,
"Can you put me up for the night?"
Satanic Barney Proof
Given: Barney is a CUTE PURPLE DINOSAUR
Prove: Barney is satanic
The Romans had no letter 'U', and used 'V' instead for
printing, meaning the Roman representation would for
Barney would be: CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR
CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR
Extracting the Roman numerals, we have:
CV V L DI V
And their decimal equivalents are:
100 5 5 50 500 1 5
Adding those numbers produces: 666.
666 is the number of the Beast.
Proved: BARNEY IS SATAN!
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One of the bachelors in the apartment development sneaked up
behind an older woman, covered her eyes with his hands, and said, "I'm
going to kiss you if you can't tell me who I am in three guesses."
She quickly answered, "George Washington! Thomas Jefferson!
A man complaining to a friend: "I had it all - money, a beautiful house,a
big car, the love of a beautiful woman ...then ... pow! ... it was all
"What happened?" asked the friend.
"Ahhhh ... my wife found out ..."
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