There was a young man of Datchet
Who cut off his prick with a hatchet.
Then very politely
He sent it to Whitely,
And ordered a cunt that would match it.
"There is a young girl here at Vassar
And none, for your needs, could surpass her.
But she cannot detach it
And much less dispatch it.
You'll still have to bach it. Alas, sir!"