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Presidential Election'2000

Dear Abby,

I am a sailor in the US Coast Guard. My parents live in the suburb of
Philadelphia and one of my sisters, who lives in Bensenville, is married
to a transvestite. My father and mother have recently been arrested for
growing and selling marijuana and are currently dependent on my other
two sisters, who are prostitutes in Jersey City. I have two brothers, one
who is currently serving a non-parole life sentence in Attica for rape and
murder of a teenage boy in 1994. The other brother is currently being
held in the Wellington Remand Center on charges of incest with his three
children. I have recently become engaged to marry a former Thai prostitute 
who lives in the Bronx and indeed is still a part-time "working girl" in a 
brothel. However her time there is limited, as we hope to open our own 
brothel with her as the working manager. I am hoping my two sisters would 
be interested in joining our team. Although I would prefer them not to 
prostitute themselves, at least it would get them off the street,
and hopefully the heroin... Abby, my problem is this: I love my fiance
and look forward to bringing her into the family and of course I want to
be totally honest with her... Should I tell her about my cousin who voted
for Bush?

Signed,
Worried about my reputation


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