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Today's poems [4.4.21]

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A habit uncouth and unsav'ry, 
               Kept the Bishop of Essex in slav'ry, 
                    Midst shrieks, hoots, and howls, 
                    He'd bugger large owls, 
               Which he kept in an underground av'ry.

1. 




               "Last night," said a lassie named Ruth, 
               "In a long-distance telephone booth, 
                    I enjoyed the perfection 
                    Of an ideal connection--- 
               I was screwed, if you must know the truth." 

2. 




There was a young man in Hong Kong 
               Who grew seven fathoms of prong. 
                    It looked, when erect, 
                    About as you'd expect--- 
               When coiled it did not seem so long. 

3. 




There was a young girl from Seattle 
            Who got her kicks sucking off cattle, 
                'til a bull from the South 
                Popped a load in her mouth 
            That made both her ovaries rattle. 

4. 




            Remember those two of Aberystwyth 
            Who connected the things that they pissed with? 
                She sat on his lap 
                But they both had the clap, 
            And they cursed with the things that they kissed with. 

5. 



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