Today's quotes [2.23.21] Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.
Definition of Stress: The confusion created when one's mind overrides the body's desire to beat or choke the living shit out of some asshole who desperately needs it.
"Television - a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well-done." -- Ernie Kovacs
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.
Life is a shit sandwich & everyday you take another bite.
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