Today's poems [2.23.21]

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A renowned archaeologist Vern,
Who unearthed an Egyptian clay urn,
Found himself devastated
When the markings, translated,
Clearly read, "No Refill/No Return." 

He was great in the Christmas Cantata,
He could double-stop fart The Toccata,
He'd boom from his ass
Bach's B-Minor Mass,
And in counterpoint, La Traviata. 

The typists in Wheesley and Beesley
All fornicate keenly and eas'ly,
In this pleasant way
They add to their pay
Which in Wheesley and Beesley is measly

There was a young fellow from Lees 
            Who handled his tool with great ease. 
                This continual friction 
                Made his sex a mere fiction, 
            But the callus hangs down to his knees. 

There was a young peasant named Gorse 
               Who fell madly in love with his horse. 
                    Said his wife, "You rapscallion, 
                    That horse is a stallion--- 
               This constitutes grounds for divorce." 

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