Today's stories [1.9.21] Vote for the story that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to story categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your story reading.
My cousin Denney came to visit from the farm last summer. I asked how his bus ride was and he said he had a good ride except for a rude lady he encountered. I asked what the problem was, and he said that when the lady got on there were no seats left, so he offered her his seat. She declined since she was only riding for a short distance. However, while she was standing with her butt right in his face, he noticed her dress was caught up in her crack. He decided to be nice and help her so he pulled it out. Well, she turned around and wopped him hard enough to turn his lights out! Then I asked him what he did then? And Denney said that since she was that rude, he poked the dress right back in there!
When we were looking to buy property I had this over zealous realtor show us what can only be described as a totally worn- out old farm. I mean the land had just been worked to death. The weeds were hardly even growing. The smiling super salesman said, "Now really, all this land needs is a little water, a nice cool breeze and some good people." I replied, "Yeah, I agree, but couldn't the same be said of Hell?"
There once was a conservative college in the mid-west that had a standing rule, the heat was not to be turned on in the dormitories prior to a certain date. Unfortunately, one year, winter decided to rear its ugly head early. Students in both the men's and women's dormitories complained about the bitter cold, but were told that nothing could be done. After days of no heat and no respite in immediate sight, the ladies realized that their dorm faced the equally cold men's dorm. They turned a bed sheet into a banner with the message, "TURN ON THE HEAT OR WE'LL TURN ON THE BOYS!"
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