Today's poems [8.1.20]

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               There was a young man of Manhasset 
               Whose life seemed excessively placid. 
                    One day, just for fun, 
                    He raped an old nun, 
               And filled up her crevice with acid. 

There was a young man from Darjeeling 
               Whose dong reached up to the ceiling. 
                    In the electric light socket 
                    He'd put it and rock it--- 
               Oh God! What a wonderful feeling! 

On Margaret Daniels grave at Hollywood Cemetery Richmond, Virginia:

She always said her feet were killing her
but nobody believed her.

There was a young fellow from Sparta,
A really magnificent farter,
On the strength of one bean
He'd fart God Save The Queen,
And Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata. 

There was a young genius in Texas 
Who could flex his own solar plexus. 
It made his ding bounce, 
And he caught every ounce 
Of his magical spraying of sexus.

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