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Today's stories [6.29.20]

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Sign in a Japanese hotel: 

    You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid. 

1. 




Last weekend I was in the grocery store getting a gallon of milk. As a walk up to the check out
line the lady in front of me turns around and says, " You are such a doll, you look almost 
identical to my daughter." Being polite I said thank you and asked the woman if her daughter 
was in college? I woman replied, "No she died about 2 years ago in car accident." I was in 
complete shock; I didn't no what to say. As the woman was handing the clerk her coupons she 
asked me to do a favor for her. I couldn't say no or it would seem too awkward. She asked me 
if I would wave at her and say "by mom." as she was leaving. Feeling very weird, as the lady 
was leaving I said "by mom!" When the clerk rang up my milk he said that will be $65.39. I am 
thinking WHAT?! The clerk said your mom told me you would take the bill for her also. My first 
reaction was to run after the lady. As I was close behind her, maybe a foot, I tripped and 
pulled her leg just like I am pulling yours!! 


2. 




Well, a couple months back there was this trial in the West Virginia 
courts. A man was being tried for fornicating with a sheep. Anyway,
the key witness was an old fella who was walking along the highway by the 
farm where the sheep was raised. 
The prosecutor asked the witness what he saw. "Well, I was walkin'
along, and saw this sheep just'a eatin' grass. And then this fella walks up
from behind the sheep, real quiet-like." 
"And then what?" asked the prosecutor. 
"Then he unbuckled his belt, and pulled the sheep close." 
" And what happened after that?" 
"Well," said the witness, "they sorta shook for a couple of minutes. 
THEN, afterwards, the sheep turned around... an' licked him!" 
Just then one of the members of the jury leaned over to the jury
member next to him and said, "You know... a good sheep'll do that."

3. 



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