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Today's jokes [6.3.20]

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Q.      Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio?
A.      It took her a month to realize she could play it at night.




1. 




What is the definition of ultimate rejection? 

     Your hand falling asleep while masturbating. 

2. 




Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks.  Then 
they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to 
eat.  The owner became quite concerned and marched over and 
told them, "You can't eat your own sandwiches in here!"

The attorneys looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders 
and then exchanged sandwiches.

3. 




Why do they put strings on tampons?

So you can floss after you eat!

4. 




   A girl goes to the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her
   blouse, he notices a red "H" on her chest.
   
   "How did you get that mark on your chest?", asks the doctor.
   
   "Oh my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it that he never
   takes off his sweatshirt, even when we make love", she replies.
   
   A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she
   takes off her blouse, he notices a blue "Y" on her chest.
   
   "How did you get that mark on your chest?", asks the doctor.
   
   "Oh my boyfriend went to Yale and he's so proud of it that he never
   takes off his sweatshirt, even when we make love", she replies.
   
   A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she
   takes off her blouse, he notices a green "M" on her chest.
   
   "Do you have a boyfriend at Michigan?" asks the doctor.
   
   She replies, "No, but I have a girlfriend at Wisconsin, why do you
   ask?"
   


5. 



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