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Today's jokes [5.1.20]

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Q: How do you know when you've satisfied a redhead?

A: She unties you. 

1. 




I was walking down an alley last night, when I heard,
"Help! Help!" coming from behind a dumpster. Two thugs
were trying to steal an old lady's handbag, but she
putting up a Hell of a fight and wouldn't let go. 
I wondered if I should get involved, or keep walking
and pretend I didn't see anything... I finally decided
that I should help. 
It didn't take the three of us very long to get her handbag. 

2. 




Name something a duck can do, that a doctor won't.

Stick his bill up his ass.

3. 




How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.

4. 




A girl sat sobbing in the police station. "I was raped by an Italian."
She wailed.
"How do you know it was an Italian? The detective asked.
"I had to help him," the girl replied.

5. 



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