Today's quotes [3.10.20]
Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to quote categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.
A.A.A.A.A. - An organization for drunks who drive.
A Cannibal is a person who walks into a restaurant and orders a waiter.
- Morey Amsterdam
English is the language up with which I will not put
The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history...this
century's history...We all lived in this century. I didn't live in
-- Dan Quayle, then Indiana senator and Republican vice-presidential
candidate during a news conference in which he was asked his opinion
of the Holocaust
"... the movie looks it was filmed by a rhesus monkey with a video camera. The
editing looks like it was performed by a rhesus monkey with a Cuisinart.
Apparently, if you're a rhesus monkey, you can really go places in Hollywood."
-- Mr. Cranky
By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's JokesToday's StoriesToday's PoemsToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
2 3 4 5 6 7 8
9 10 11 12 13 14 15
16 17 18 19 20 21 22
23 24 25 26 27 28 29