Today's poems [3.15.20] Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to poem categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.
There was a young whore whose de-light Was to lure all the men of the night. She'd en-trap them with bets, Then ad-mi-re their pecks And then stare at the ceil-ing all night.
A lad from far-off Transvaal Was lustful, but tactful withal. He'd say, just for luck, "Mam'selle, do you fuck?" But he'd bow till he almost would crawl.
Mary had a little lamb, Its fleece was slightly grey. It didn't have a father, Just some borrowed DNA. It sort of had a mother, Though the ovum was on loan. It was not so much a lambkin As a little lamby clone. And soon it had a fellow clone, And soon it had some more. It made the children laugh and sing, The teachers found it droll; There were too many lamby clones For Mary to control. No other could control the sheep Since their programs didn't vary, So the scientists resolved it all By simply cloning Mary. But now they feel quite sheepish, Those scientists unwary. One problem solved, but what to do With Mary, Mary, Mary?
There once was a Bishop of Treet Who decided to be indiscreet, But after one round To his horror he found You repeat, and repeat, and repeat.
On May Day the girls of Penzance, Being bored by the lack of romance, Joined the workers' parade With this banner displayed: "What the Pants of Penzance Need is Ants."
By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's JokesToday's StoriesToday's QuotesToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31