Today's stories [11.7.20]

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An associate at work a number of years ago related this story which
he swore was true... 
He was dating a Jehovah's Witness, (I don't know what sort of date 
would make, milk and cookies after prayers, or some such thing),
and they were driving along a rural road on a murky day. He muttered
some offhanded obscenity, and his date started scolding him, saying
that He would not want him to swear. Kidding, he swore at her again
when all of a sudden the murky sky turned into a raging cloudburst.
Lighting struck a telephone pole not too far away, and his horrified
date said, "See! I told you He does not want you to swear!" To which
he quipped, "Yeah, but the Son of a Bitch missed, didn't he?". 
They were moving slowly because of the heavy rain, and the girl fairly
leaped out of the car without waiting for it to stop,. and ran off into
the dark never to be seen again.

In a study of college students, Cornell University researchers 
confirmed that men generally prefer thin women to fat ones. It's 
part of Cornell's new "M.Obv - Masters of the Obvious" degree 
program. 

As an art teacher for an elementary school here in Jacksonville, Florida, 
one of my recent assignments for the children was to enter a contest that 
our new national football team, the Jacksonville Jaguars, was promoting.

The winning artwork gets placed on the back of the season tickets, so I 
encouraged the children to come up with a good logo and a colorful 
creation.

One innocent little girl was so enthused about her masterpiece she turned 
in to me. It had a picture of a mean looking jaguar that read, "You're 
messin' with the wrong pussy."

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