Today's poems [11.6.20] Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to poem categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.
There was an old soldier named Schmitt Took a trip to the can for to shit. To his epic despair No paper was there. So he simply continued to sit.
Said an ardent young bridegroom named Trask, "I will grant any wish that you ask," Said the bride, "Kiss me, dearie, Until I grow weary," But he died of old age at the task.
Pardon My French ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ The finest culture Comes from Frontz And hoe-knee-swat-key Molly-ponce! Sally learned To speak in French She's now a dame And not a wench Dick acquired That language fair And now he's swayve And deb-an-err Speaking French Will prove you're better Show you've got a Rays-on-debtor Read in French And sack-ray-blue! You're sure to find Your tom-pair-doo Write in French And you'll be famous Just like muss-your Albert Camus You can bet Your dairy-air Your French will prove Your salve-war-fare He who is A true believer Shows his Gallic Joyed-a-fever French cuisine Is all the rage So drink Bored-O With soft from-age Wear a little Black beret And eat cross-ants With French calf-A Then there's all That art you know So speak bow-czar And art-new-foe And what a joy To smoke Get-tans While watching films That come from Cans I guess it's not An easy job To be a phony Stuck-up snob... Such games in Frontz They also play But there "c'est snob" To speak anglais!
There was a fat man from Rangoon Whose prick was mich like a balloon. He tried hard to ride her And when finally inside her She thought she was pregnant too soon.
There was a young man named Tom Who ran screaming home to his mom. The fear of the Bomb Scared him back in the womb--- The bastard, he wasn't so dumb!
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