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Today's poems [11.2.20]

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                       Vendor's 12 Days of Christmas
     
   
On the 12th day of Christmas my vendor gave to me:

        12 days to set up
        11 acronyms
        10 more megahertz
        9 brand new standards
        8 more megs of RAM
        7 minor upgrades
        6 hidden features
        5 tons of docs
        4 new API's
        3 more months of waiting
        2 more SCSI drives

And a bug fix for Windows NT.

(c) 1993 The Bill Gates of Hell Society
  


1. 




Make My Boobies One More Size

 ~~~~Biggie Spears


  Oh booby booby
  Oh booby booby

  Oh booby booby
  My chest was supposed to grow
  My cleavage wasn't right yeah
  Oh boobies boobies
  My breasts are completely full
  And now my sweater's tight yeah
  Surgery
  I wanna be a size "d"
  Bigger memories
  I want them to show
  Now oh because

 Chorus:
 My chest flatness was killing me
 And i
 I must confess
 I paid for these
 (paid for these)
 I look 32
 I'm just a child
 I am a crime
 Make my boobies one more size

 Oh baby baby
 I got double D's it's true
 Now you've all been blinded
 Oh pretty boobies
 Your so big and oh so new
 That's just the way I planned it

 Golly
 Rolling Stone was naughty
 See me baby
 Barely wearing clothes
 Now oh because
  
 Chorus:
 My chest flatness was killing me
 And i
 I must confess
 I paid for these
 (paid for these)
 I look 32
 I'm just a child
 I am a crime
 Make my boobies one more size

2. 




Said a pretty young whore from Hong Kong
To a long pronged patron named Wong,
"They say my vagina's
The nicest in China;
Don't ruin it by donging it wrong." 

3. 




               There once was a midwife of Gaul 
               Who had hardly no business at all. 
                    She cried, "Hell and damnation! 
                    There's no procreation--- 
               God made the French penis too small."

4. 




Part 3 of 12
   
                    This sparkling young farter from Sparta,
                            
                    His fart for no money would barter.
                            He could roar from his rear
                            Any scene from Shakespeare,
                            
                    Or Gilbert and Sullivan's Mikado.
                            


5. 



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