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Today's jokes [11.14.20]

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What's the difference between a blonde and a light bulb?

Well, the light bulb is smarter, but the blonde is easier to turn on.

1. 




Definition of bad lover:

An earthquake occurs during sex. Afterwards he asks the woman if she felt 
the earth move. She says no.

2. 




What are the three fastest means of communication?

Internet 
Telephone 
Telawoman!

3. 




A fellow's wife was very worried about her husband's heavy drinking and 
one night she decided to give him a fright. She draped herself in a white 
sheet and went down to the local cemetery, knowing that her husband was 
in the habit of taking a shortcut through it on his way home from the 
pub. It was not long before he came staggering along, and out she jumped 
from behind a headstone. "Ooooooo!" she wailed, "I am the Devil!" 

He sticks out his hand..."Put it there, pal," he says, "I am married to 
your sister."

4. 




What's the difference between a blonde and a shower?

The shower has to be turned on before it gets wet.

5. 



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