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Today's stories [9.6.19]

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Happened in Kentucky --

Two men tried to pull the front off an ATM by running a chain
from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of
pulling the front panel off the machine, though, they pulled the
bumper off their truck. Scared, they left the scene and drove
home--.  with the chain still attached to the machine-- with
their bumper still attached to the chain-- with their vehicle's
license plate still attached to the bumper.

1. 




STATISTICALLY SPEAKING

Germany was frequently bombing Russia during World War 
II.  Every time the air raid siren sounded, people rushed to 
the nearest air raid bomb shelter.  One person who never 
took shelter was a professor of statistics.  He argued that 
there are seven million people in Russia and the probability 
of a bomb actually dropping on him was very small.  Then 
suddenly one day when the air raid siren was sounded the 
professor rushed to the air raid shelter along with his 
neighbours from the building.
"Lost your nerver professor ?"asked one of his aquaitances.
" NO" said the professor " but I have realized that the bombs 
do not observe the laws of probability.  There were seven 
million people and one elephant in Russia .  Yesterday they 
got the elephant."

Sent by nanditha 

2. 




I once worked as a contractor in another state, and another 
girl on the team, also a contractor from quite a distance 
away, was constantly ratting out other members of the team 
to the boss, and was snippy and always overreacted to any 
kind of language or inference to any sort of sexual topic.  
She was constantly offended at our frequent joke-telling.
One Friday she was going to drive home - several states 
away -  for the weekend.  Before she left, I stuck a bumper 
sticker on the roof of her car (she was short so couldn't see it 
up there) and the sticker said "I LIKE TO ---- TRUCKERS.  
HONK IF YOU WANT ME TO PULL OVER"  (the blank wasn't 
blank on the sticker). I can only guess what kind of a ride 
home she had.  If she ever even GOT there....


Sent by Jennifer

3. 



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