Today's quotes [3.2.19]
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When I heated my home with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons
a year. I have found that I can keep comfortably warm for an
entire winter with slightly over half that quantity of beer.
- Postpetroleum Guzzler, Dave Barry
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind
is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention,
but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
- Dave Barry's Bad Habits, Dave Barry
The Holocaust was an obscene period in our
nation's history...this century's history...
We all lived in this century. I didn't
live in this century.
-- Dan Quayle, then Indiana senator and Republican
vice-presidential candidate during a news
conference in which he was asked his
opinion of the Holocaust
You know, medicine is not an exact science, but we are learning
all the time. Why, just fifty years ago they thought a disease
like your daughter's was caused by demonic possession or witchcraft.
But nowadays, we know that Isabelle is suffereing from an imbalance
of bodily humors, perhaps caused by a toad or a small dwarf living
in her stomach.
- Theodoric of York, Saturday Night Live
I've always thought that underpopulated countries in
Africa are vastly under polluted.
-- Lawrence Summers, chief economist of the World Bank,
explaining why we should export toxic wastes to
Third World countries
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