Today's jokes [3.5.19]
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A little girl asked her father, "Daddy? Do all Fairy Tales begin with Once
Upon A Time?"
And he replied, "No, there is a whole series of Fairy Tales that begin
with 'If Elected I promise...'"
When I was in jr. high, all I wanted was a girl with big breasts...
In high school, I dated a girl with big breasts, but there was no
So I decided I needed a passionate girl..
In college, I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional..
Everything was an emergency, she cried all the time. So I decided I
needed a girl with some stability..
I found a very stable girl, but she was boring. She never got excited
about anything. So I decided I needed a girl with some excitement..
I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with her. She rushed
from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She was
So I decided to find a girl with some ambition..
After college, I found an ambitious girl and married her. She was so
ambitious, she divorced me and took everything I owned..
Now all I want is a girl with big breasts..
This blonde and her boyfriend were sitting in a hot tub when the
blonde said to her boyfriend,
"Is it true that if you pull you finger out, I'll sink?"
Two bananas are lying on a river bank when a turd comes floating by.
The turd looks over and says, "Hey! Come on in! The water's fine!"
One banana turns to the other banana and says, "Do you believe that
A hunchback is running along a street being chased by a pack of children.
He stops, turns around and shouts, "Will you all get lost! I haven't got
your bloody ball!"
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