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Today's jokes [3.2.19]

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Q:What's another term for lesbian?
A:Vagitarian.


1. 




After a long pubcrawl those two guys discuss wether the moon is red or
green. Since they can't come to a conclusion they go searching a cop. 
Finally they find one and ask him: "Please, officcccer, could you tell us
if the moon is red or green?" 

The cop looks up and asks back: "The left or the right one?"
 

2. 




This bloke was ordered from the pool for pissing in the water.
"That's ridiculous!" he shouted at the pool manager. "Everybody does it,
you know."
"That may be so," came the reply, "but usually not from the diving board."


3. 




I've never been much on fashion, but got quite a few compliments on a new sports jacket I wore to work one day. My
secretary asked me where I got it and I told her that it was a surprise from my wife. I went home early yesterday, and there it
was, on the back of a kitchen chair. 

4. 




Age         Line

17         My parents are away for the weekend.
25         My girlfriend is away for the weekend.
35         My fiancee is away for the weekend.
48         My wife is away for the weekend.
66         My second wife is dead.

5. 



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