Today's jokes [12.3.19]
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Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: How much money have you got?
Twenty men die and go to heaven. When they arrive they are told
to seperate into two lines. One for all the husbands that are
under their wives control and they other for those that control
After the men seperate one of the angels notices that their are
nineteen men in the first line and only one in the second.
The angel walks up to the man and asks why he was so sure of his
"That's easy," said the fellow, "My wife told me to stand here!"
This guy and his girlfriend are fighting....she says "I'm breaking up
with you." "Why??"
he asks. She says "because you are a pedophile".
He says "Pedophile?????? Hmmmm that's an awfully big word for a 10
A florist received an outraged telephone call from a man who
had moved his restaurant to a new spot in town. The restaurant
owner had been sent a funeral wreath along with a card that read:
The florist realized that he must have mixed up two orders and
shuddered to think of the flowers that should have gone to the
restaurant man.He had sent to the funeral a clover design of
red roses across which was a bright green ribbon bearing the
inscription: BEST OF LUCK IN YOUR NEW LOCATION.
So one sperm says to the other "When do we get to the ovaries?"
The other replies "Ovaries! We're not even past the throat yet!"
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