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Today's stories [10.7.19]

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Redmond -- Citing the event as a new era of peace and cooperation, Bill 
Gates today announced Microsoft's purchase of Netscape.

Said Gates: "Hopefully now the world knows we're serious about the Web." 
Microsoft's first move will be to combine the two browsers, with the MINE 
(Microsoft Internet Netscape Explorer) browser due this year. "When we 
release this version," said Gates, "all Web access will be MINE."


You've all heard of the Air Force's ultra-high-security, super-secret base 
in Nevada, known simply as "Area 51?"

Well, late one afternoon, the Air Force folks out at Area 51 were very 
surprised to see a Cessna landing at their "secret" base. They immediately 
impounded the aircraft and hauled the pilot into an interrogation room.

The pilot's story was that he took off from Vegas, got lost, and spotted 
the Base just as he was about to run out of fuel. The Air Force started a 
full FBI background check on the pilot and held him overnight during the 

By the next day, they were finally convinced that the pilot really was 
lost and wasn't a spy. They gassed up his airplane, gave him a terrifying 
"you-did-not-see-a-base" briefing, complete with threats of spending the 
rest of his life in prison, told him Vegas was that-a-way on such-and-such 
a heading, and sent him on his way.

The next day, to the total disbelief of the Air Force, the same Cessna 
showed up again. Once again, the MP's surrounded the plane...only this 
time there were two people in the plane.

The same pilot jumped out and said, "Do anything you want to me, but my 
wife is in the plane and you have to tell her where I was last night!"

Sent by Vic


When asked by the Pope (I forget which one) what the Catholic Church
could do for music, Igor Stravinsky is reputed to have answered without
hesitation: "Give us back castrati!" 


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