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Today's jokes [10.5.19]

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If you are considering doing some camping this summer, please note the following public service
announcement: 
In Alaska, tourists are warned to wear tiny bells on their clothing when hiking in bear
country. 
The bells warn away MOST bears (brown, black, etc.), but be careful because they don't scare 
Grizzly Bears. 
Tourists are cautioned to watch the ground on the trail, paying particular attention to bear 
droppings to be alert for the presence of Grizzly Bears. 
One can easily spot a Grizzly dropping because it has tiny bells in it. 

1. 




At 3 am a desk clerk at a hotel gets a call from a drunk guy asking
what time the bar opens. "It opens at noon," answers the clerk.

About an hour later he gets a call from the same guy, sounding even=
drunker. "What time does the bar open?" he asks.

"Same time as before... Noon," replies the clerk.

Another hour passes and he calls again, plastered. 
"Whatjoo shay the bar opins at?"

The clerk then answers, "It opens at noon, but if you can't wait, I
can have room service send something up to you."

"No... I don't wanna git in... Ah wanna git OUT!!!"

2. 




   What makes a man think he's so great ?
   1) He has a belly button that won't work.
   2) He has tits that won't give milk.
   3) He has a cock that won't crow.
   4) He has balls that won't roll.
   5) He has an ass that won't carry a thing.
   


3. 




Two gay men were in bed fooling around when all of a
sudden the door bell rings. The first gay man tells
the second, "Don't cum until I come back", and he
rushes off to answer the door.
After a few minutes, he eagerly returns to the bedroom
only to find cum was all over the bed and sheets. He
says to the second gay man, "I thought you wasn't going
to cum until I came back. The second gay man says to the
first, "I didn't cum, ........I farted!

Sent by Ken "C"

4. 




How come Mike Tyson's eyes always water during sex? 

     Mace... 

5. 



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