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Today's jokes [5.13.18]

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My wife and I are into S & M

She Sleeps and I masturbate


Sent by Richard

1. 




Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new car?

                         Neither has he.

2. 




What's the difference betwee Elton John and Princess Diana?

One's composing, the other is decomposing.

3. 




Q: What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?
A: Full. 

4. 




The preacher was wired for sound with a lapel mike, and as he 
preached, he moved briskly about the platform, jerking the mike 
cord as he went. 

Then he moved to one side, getting wound up in the cord and 
nearly tripping before jerking it again. 

After several circles and jerks, a little girl in the third pew 
leaned toward her mother and whispered, "If he gets loose, will 
he hurt us?"

5. 



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