Today's quotes [3.6.18]
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"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the
second one didn't."
My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it.
I put instant coffee into a microwave oven. I almost went backin time.
- Steven Wright
If you die on an elevator, be sure to press the UP button.
Early to bed, early to rise, and your girl goes out with other guys.
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