Today's poems [11.1.18]
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There was a young girl of Penzance
Who boarded a bus in a trance.
The passengers fucked her,
Likewise the conductor.
The driver shot off in his pants.
"My body, by my own admission,"
I told him, "is in top condition."
I said with a snigger,
"I worship my figure."
Then he tried to embrace my religion.
There was a girl from the five and ten
Who diddled herself with a fountain pen.
The top came off,
The ink went wild,
And now she's the mother of a coloured child.
Said a pretty young lady from Croft,
Whilst amusing herself in the loft,
"Salami or wurst
Is what I choose first,
But with baloney I know I've been boffed"
For sculpture that's really first class
You need form, composition, and mass.
To do a good Venus
Just leave off the penis,
And concentrate all on the ass.
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