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Today's poems [5.16.17]

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               There was a young man from Bangore 
               Who was tired and said to his whore, 
                    "If you'll only roll over 
                    I'll get my dog Rover, 
               And you can have six inches more." 

1. 




There was a young man from St. Paul
               Who had really no scruples at all---
                    He would fart when he'd talk,
                    And shit when he'd walk,
               And at night throw it over the wall.

2. 




               There once was a man named MacBride 
               Who fell in a privy and died. 
                    He had a young brother, 
                    Who fell in another, 
               And now they're interred (in turd) side by side. 

3. 




                               Ode to Alcohol
     
   
                        Starkle, starkle, little twink,
                        Who the hell you are I think,
                        I'm not under what they call
                        The alcofluence of incohol.
                        I'm not drunk as thinkle peep,
                        I'm just a little slort of sheep.
                        Tee martoonis make a guy
                        Fool so feelish, don't know why
                        Rally don't know who's me yet
                        The drunker I stay the longer I get
                        So just one more to full my cup,
                        I've all day sober to Sunday up.
  


4. 




To Italy went Sinclair Lewis 
               Documenting the life led by loose 
                    American drunks, 
                    But he unpacked his trunks 
               'Cause Florence slipped him a goose. 

5. 



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