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Today's jokes [5.17.17]

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How to Hunt Elephants -- Sales Style

Salespeople don't hunt elephants but spend their time
selling elephants they haven't  caught, for delivery two
days before the season opens.  Software salespeople ship the
first thing they catch and write up an invoice for an
elephant.  Hardware salespeople catch rabbits, paint them
gray and sell them as "desktop elephants."

Sent by Alex

1. 




What is the difference between a boy and a girl?

The boy is eight times more likely to be convicted of murder.

2. 




Why don't women blink during foreplay?

           They don't have time.

3. 




"What's the difference between the North American porcupine 
and the African porcupine," the society matron asked the 
zookeeper.

"The principal difference is the North American species has a 
longer prick."

This, as you might assume, distressed the matron who 
stormed immediately to the zoo manager's office. The zoo 
manager said, "Ma'am, I apologize for my staff's unfortunate 
choice of terms. What the keeper should have said is the 
North American species has a longer *quill*. In fact, their 
pricks are just about the same size."

4. 




Why can't a man eat like a bird?

Have you ever tried to pick up food with your pecker?

Sent by Chris

5. 



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