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Today's poems [4.15.17]

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There was a young man from Cape Grace 
Who blew a fart out into space. 
With gravity's attraction 
And Einstein's reaction, 
It returned and spat shit in his face!

1. 




Goodbye

Goodbye, you see its time for me to die
Itís really been fun living in hell
And Iím sure itís beginning to tell;
People are already saying God bless,
Its time this weary head was put to rest.

What is as versatile as a University?
Where the social life is a necessity
And the girls are all after the looks
Rather than what you can do with the books
But does the intention ever justify the end.

Still there are good things with life
Shame they are all double edged knifes
For the weapon is not fit as a sword,
For all we do with vast sums, is hoard
Money it seems will drive us to death.

But what are our best days I am told
It is question that is not quite so bold
For it is something that we all hold the key
Before that is when we cease to see
School and childhood is the answer.

We choose to forget those days
As it was all just a dizzy haze
It is childish and stupid we are told
But itís the most valuable that we hold
Reminding ourselves of what was in front.

People you see, always see behind
From figures to stats which seem to bind.
Important we feel they may be
But itís more relaxing just to sip tea
And try to grasp what our future holds.

Goodbye, you see its time for me to die
For what Iíve said could all be a lie
But if that was true then why do I feel dread
As I near my final challenge in facing death
Does the intention ever justify the end.

Sent by Justin Parker

2. 




There was a long lady named Weaver 
               Who had intercourse with a beaver. 
                    The result of their fuck 
                    Was a canvas-back duck, 
               Two muskrats and a hump-backed retriever. 

3. 




There was a young woman named Hunt 
At a costume ball, dressed as a cunt. 
She teamed up with Nick, 
Who had come as a dick, 
To perform an xxxceptional stunt!

4. 




My face in the mirror
                isn't wrinkled or drawn;
        My house isn't dirty,
                the cobwebs are gone.
        My garden looks lovely,
                and so does my lawn;
        I think I might never
                put my glasses back on!

5. 



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