Today's Jokes  |  Archives  |  Lists  |  Random  |  Register  |  RandJoke on Your Page  
 


Today's poems [3.6.17]

Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to poem categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.


There was a young fellow from Florida
Who liked a friend's wife, so he borrowed her.
When they got into bed,
He cried, "God strike me dead,
This ain't a cunt, it's a corridor!" 

1. 




Once a pirate named Yates 
            Danced the jig for all of his mates. 
                He slipped in his cutlas, 
                And made himself nutless, 
            And now he's quite useless on dates. 

2. 




Drink

I fell in love with a dry martini
But now she`s gone
And passed away...
Or rather, passed right through me.

After that, I drank some coffee
So momentarily
I found sobriety


She made me high
She gave me kicks
She made me ill
I was only six!

 1989 Peter Hughes.

Sent by Pete Hughes

3. 




Mary had a little lamb,
     Its fleece was slightly grey.
     It didn't have a father,
     Just some borrowed DNA.

     It sort of had a mother,
     Though the ovum was on loan.
     It was not so much a lambkin
     As a little lamby clone.

     And soon it had a fellow clone,
     And soon it had some more.
     It made the children laugh and sing,
     The teachers found it droll;
     There were too many lamby clones
     For Mary to control.

     No other could control the sheep
     Since their programs didn't vary,
     So the scientists resolved it all
     By simply cloning Mary.

     But now they feel quite sheepish,
     Those scientists unwary.
     One problem solved, but what to do
     With Mary, Mary, Mary?

4. 




There was a bluestocking in Florence 
Wrote anti-sex pamphlets in torrents, 
Till a Spanish grandee 
Got her off with his knee, 
And she burned all her works with abhorrence.

5. 



BONUS! A random poem from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD





By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read

Today's Jokes
Today's Stories
Today's Quotes
Today's Funny Pic

 March '17 Poems Issues:
S  M  T  W  Th F  St
         1  2  3  4  
5  6  7  8  9  10 11 
12 13 14 15 16 17 18 
19 20 21 22 23 24 25 
26 27 28 29 30 31 

Jump to  



For any questions or comments email us at info@jokes2go.com
Copyright© SpekGY, Inc, 1998-2016. All rights reserved.