Today's poems [2.18.12]
Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to poem categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.
There was a young fellow named Sweeney
Whose girl was a terrible meanie.
The hatch of her snatch
Had a catch that would latch---
She could only be screwed by Houdini.
There was an old Abbot of Khief
Who thought the Inpenitent Thief
Had bollocks of brass
And an amethyst ass.
He died in this awful belief.
It was under the old apple tree
That she first showed it to me.
It was ever so hot,
It was shaped like a slot,
But it looked like a subway to me.
With a twinlke so full in her eye,
She craftily mangled my fly.
Out popped a tool
That was long as a rule
And she sank to her knees with a sigh.
She proceeded to lube up my tool
With lots of her natural drool.
My knees gave a shake,
My breath hard to make,
And my tool throbbed away like a fool.
With a magnificent shake of her head,
She threw me down onto the bed.
The apples so round,
The leaves on the ground
Made my tool like a sail on the Med.
The subway engulfed all my tool.
She rocked like she's riding a mule.
My tool gave a jerk,
Let out a hot squrt,
And flooded her subway with jooul.
As the sun sank slow in the west,
She rose up and off of my chest.
The tool flopped out bent
It was terribly spent--
She absorbed all the best of the rest!
There was an old girl from the Azores
whos cunt was covered in sores
even the dogs in the street
wouldn't sniff the green meat
that hung in great chunks
from her drawers
By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's JokesToday's StoriesToday's QuotesToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8 9 10 11
12 13 14 15 16 17 18
19 20 21 22 23 24 25
26 27 28 29