Today's stories [10.18.12] Vote for the story that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to story categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your story reading.
On our last vacation, my wife and I saved some money by staying in a cheap hotel. Just as we were falling asleep, we heard the sounds of mattress springs and a banging headboard from the next room. At first we were amused by the amorous couple. After five minutes it had lost its charm. After ten minutes we were getting pretty annoyed, in that it was keeping us awake. After fifteen minutes, we were just plain ticked off. After half an hour we were pretty damned impressed.
The Policeman recently stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name. She said, "I'm Mrs. Ladislav Abdulkhashim Zybkcicraznovskaya from the Republic of Uzbekistan visiting my daughter in Columbia." The cop put away his summons book and pen, and said, "Well... OK... but don't let me catch you speeding again."
After my recent breakup and the hell I went through, I quickly dropped a few pounds. Not quite Ally-McBeal- thin but close. I ran into a friend of mine who was surprised at the quick change and commented, "Damn, you've lost a lot of weight". My response to him, "Yep, lost 220 pounds of fat German bastard".
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