Today's poems [12.14.10]
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A widow whose singular vice
Was to keep her late husband on ice
Said, "It's been hard since I lost him---
I'll never defrost him!
Cold comfort, but cheap at the price,"
A newlywed couple from Goshen
Spent their honeymoon sailing the ocean.
In twenty-eight days
They got laid eighty ways---
Imagine such fucking devotion.
A seamstress at Epping-on-Tyne
Used to peddle her tail down the line.
She first got a crown,
But her prices went down---
Now she'll fit you for ten pence or nine.
There once was a eunuch of Roylem,
Took two eggs to the cook and said, "Boil 'em.
I'll sling 'em beneath
My inadequate sheath,
And slip into the harem and foil 'em."
Should a fellow discover some night
A girl's body in bed, it's all right.
He should think it good luck,
And accept the free fuck---
He will bugger her too, if he's bright.
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