Said a meaty young woman of Croft,
Amusing herself in the loft,
"A salami or wurst
Is what I should choose first---
With bologna you know you've been boffed."
There was a young lady called Valerie
Who started to count every calory
Said her boss in disgust:
"If you lose half your bust
You'll be worth only half of your salary!"
There was a Young Lady, whose chin
Resembled a point of a pin;
So she had it made sharp,
And purchased the harp.
And played several tunes with her chin
Why, oh why, does this happen to me?
How did I end up stuck in this tree?
The ground down below looks so far away,
That if I would fall it would take me all day
To hit the ground, with a thud and a thunk.
And knowing my luck I'd land on a skunk.
So here I will sit 'til my dying day.
Or maybe, at least, 'til that bear goes away.
Smoking reefer didn't cause him to fail,
And that Lewinsky affair is a tale.
These two things they will name,
When the defense makes its claim,
That neither Bill nor the girl did inhale.
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