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Today's stories[6.2.02]

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One of my friends was dating a blonde girl that wasn't too bright to say the least. Often she would come up with the most stupid comments that at first got us all laughing, but after a while also became a bit annoying to some. One day we were sitting in a pool hall talking. The blonde participated in the discussion, and when she came up with an even for unusually stupid comment one of my friends couldn't take it anymore. So he said to her "You must have vacuum in your head". This upset her. She looked at him for a couple of seconds and replied, "At least it's better than nothing".
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Heard from a tourbus driver in Washington DC earlier today: Had you heard that Socks the Cat died last night? Yeah, he climbed into bed between Bill and Hillary and froze to death.
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Late one Saturday evening, I was awakened by the ringing of my phone. In a sleepy grumpy voice I said hello. The party on the other end of the line paused for a moment before rushing breathlessly into a lengthy speech. "Mom, this is Susan and I'm sorry I woke you up, but I had to call because I'm going to be a little late getting home. See, Dad's car has a flat but it's not my fault. Honest! I don't know what happened. The tire just went flat while we were inside the theater. Please don't be mad, okay?" Since I don't have any daughters, I knew the person had misdialed. "I'm sorry dear," I replied, "but you've reached the wrong number. I don't have a daughter named Susan." "Gosh, Mom, "came the young woman's voice, "I didn't think you'd be this mad."
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