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Today's stories[6.12.02]

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An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happens." The "foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse.
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A lady who was known as Churchill's main rival in parliament was giving a speech. Churchill, with his usual enthusiasm for his rival, dozed off while the lady was speaking. She stopped her speech and awoke Sir Winston by yelling, "Mr. Churchill, must you sleep while I talk?" Churchill sleepily replied, "No, ma'am. I do so purely by choice."
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At one job I had, the boss man got the idea that the IT department should be living up to the slogan, "Giving every user what they need." I politely requested, "How do we get them to turn around so we can kick them in the ass?" It went over quite well, the room fell out laughing. I don't work there any more.
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