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Today's quotes[9.8.01]

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"Joy! Rapture!"
"Gourmet seat coverings!"
                        -- me, Alasdair

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"Did you ever get to thinking that maybe you are just an android, placed on Earth by an advanced civilization of huge radish-like aliens who are studying your every move?" "No." "Me neither." -- Dogbert, Dilbert, Dogbert
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"Oh yes, for dinner we had an amazing meal which consisted of coagulated cholesterol cooked in a mixture of cholesterol and cholesterol, covered in ground cholesterol and cooked, then served with a cholesterol sauce and a sprinkler of cholesterol in the middle of the table in case it's not heavy enough. You could feel your arteries closing up just looking at it." -- Peter Gutmann, in alt.sysadmin.recovery
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"While the Big "M" folks in Redmond maintain the products are vastly different, critics allege Workstation can be switched into the Server version with a few easy tweaks. An official Microsoft marketer suggests that's like arguing the only difference between men and women is a Y chromosome. We think it's more akin to discovering your date is in drag." -- Unknown, on the differences between Microsoft NT Workstation 4.0 and Server 4.0
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"Interestingly, most Unix utilities have a command line option which will cause the system to rip the user's legs off and beat them to death with the soggy ends. This is often the default behaviour." -- Bruce Murphy
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