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Today's quotes[9.13.01]

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Copyright (C) 1996 Association for the Study of Meats. All rights reserved.
 Your mileage may vary. Shipped by weight, not by volume. Legal in 49 states.
 Sorry, Tennessee. Fnord"
                        -- Disclaimer from the home page of the
                           Association for the Study of Meats




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"It is the policy of the Association for the Study of Meats not to engage in discrimination or harassment against any person on the basis of race, color, religion, intelligence, sex, lack thereof, national origin, ancestry, incestry, age, marital status, disability, sexual orientation, unfavorable discharge from the military, other unfavorable discharges, or status as a disabled veteran or veteran of the Vietnam era and to comply with all Federal and State non-discrimination, equal opportunity and affirmative action laws, orders, and regulations. The University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign does not necessarily endorse, recommend, or approve the products and services mentioned on this page. However, the administrators probably eat Spam(tm), so you shouldn't really care what they think. You are dumb. The above statement does not necessarily reflect the views of the Univerity of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign (but you know that's what they think of you).
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2
"We've got a kitchen by Giger, but we're too scared to go in there." -- from the sig of Peter H. Coffin, in alt.sysadmin.recovery
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3
"Still not getting any." -- Drew Hamilton, in an article titled "July 17 Update" in alt.sex.drew-hamilton
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"You have to take a lighter approach now. Jumping up on a table in a busy restaurant, swinging from the ceiling fans, and screaming, 'YOU'RE ALL GONNA BURN IN HELL,' just scares people away." -- Interview with Steven Forker, on his future role as the Third Coming of Christ, in Precious the Cow Magazine (from the sig of Lt. Wilkes)
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