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Today's poems[9.27.01]

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There was an old lady who lay 
            With her legs wide apart in the hay, 
                Then calling the ploughman, 
                She said, "Do it now, man! 
            Don't wait till your hair has turned gray." 

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"At a seance," said a young man named Post, "I was being sucked off by a ghost; Someone switched on the lights And there in guaze tights, On his knees, was Tobias mine host."
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There was a young lady from Munich Who was had in a park by a eunuch. In a moment of passion He shot her a ration From a squirt-gun concealed 'neath his tunic.
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There once was a fellow named Trete Who from birth was inclined to be neat. He became extra fussy When he thought his pants mussy, And would throw them away in the street.
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There was a young man of St. Paul's Possessed the most useless of balls. Till at last, at The Strand, He managed a stand, And tossed himself off in the stalls.
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