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How does every ethnic joke start?
By looking over your shoulder.
Send this joke to a friend 1 Two nuns turn up at the fruit market and ask the veggie man for 120
cucumbers. The guy advises: "Sisters, if you buy 3 crates, that's 150,
you'll get a 25% discount !" The nuns look at each other, and after a
prolonged period of thinking one whispers to the other:
"We could eat the 30, I suppose."
Send this joke to a friend 2 A couple have not been getting along for years, so the husband thinks,
"I'll buy my wife a cemetery plot for her birthday."
Well, you can imagine her disappointment.
The next year, her birthday rolls around again and this
time he doesn't get her anything.
She says, "Why didn't you get me a birthday present!?"
He replies, "You didn't use what I got you last year!"
Send this joke to a friend 3 A young Army 1st Lt. is in the bathroom (head) releaving
himself at the urinal, when a young boy walks in. The boy,
seeing the young Lt.'s green uniform asks him if he was in the
Army. The Lt. smiles and say's, "Why yes I am...you wanna
wear my hat?" The boy nods and the hat is placed on his head.
As the boy admired himself in the mirror, the bathroom door
slammed open and an old Marine Corps Gunnery Sgt walked in.
He was decked out in his Dress Blue Uniform, with medals down
his chest. The boy, seeing the uniform asked him, "Hey, are
you a Marine?" The Gunnery Sgt peared down at the boy and
responded, "That's right! Why? Do wanna suck me off?" The
boy replied nervously, "I-I-I'm not in the Army!! I'm just
wearing his hat!!"
Sent by Brian
Send this joke to a friend 4 A Texan bought a round of drinks for all in the bar and
announced that his wife had just produced a typical Texas
baby, weighing a whopping twenty pounds.
"WOW!" was the response from everyone at the bar.
Two weeks later the Texan returned to the bar. The bartender
recognized him and asked, "Aren't you the father of the baby
that weighed twenty pounds at birth? How much does he weigh
The proud father answered, "10 pounds."
The bartender said, "Why? I know that babies lose some
weight after birth, but ten pounds? He did weigh twenty
pounds, didn't he? What happened?
The proud Texas father said, "Just had him circumcised!"
Send this joke to a friend 5